by Larry and Barbara Magnuson
Most of us are better at telling than asking questions.
For the first half of my ministry, my primary responsibility as lead pastor of a growing church was teaching and preaching. Both are important tools that God uses in profound ways, but the last twenty years I have learned the art of asking questions and listening. In my opinion, these tools are often even more significant and powerful.
As Barbara and I sat with hundreds of ministry couples and singles across the last twenty years, it became clear to us that most of them did not need us to talk at them. What they needed was someone to genuinely listen to them and lovingly ask questions that opened doors to deeper thought and self discovery.
Jesus was a master communicator. Interestingly, his primary tools of communication were storytelling and questions. We are familiar with Jesus’ stories, but did you know he asked 307 questions recorded in the Gospels? 307 and he answered only three. When John and Andrew first encountered Jesus, they apparently had no idea what to do or say so they simply followed him. Jesus turned to them and asked a very simple but profound question, “What do you want?” Think about it. What do you want? What do I want? It is a question that can be answered with a shallow answer or much more deeply. John and Andrew chose the first . . . “Where are you staying?” I have to believe there was a twinkle in Jesus’ eye as he responded. “Come and you will see.” Yes, they would see where Jesus was staying but they would see so much more! A question not a statement.
Barbara made a list of some of the questions Jesus asked. Questions that were so simple but forced the listeners to wrestle with the profound issues of their lives. They are questions worth considering by all of us.
- Who do you say I am?
- Do you believe?
- Do you want to get well?
- Why are you so afraid?
- Why do you doubt?
- Do you love me?
The truth is there are profound questions all through the pages of Scripture. I recently read Psalms 10 which begins with a couple of piercing questions; Why Lord do you stand far off? Why do you sometimes hide yourself in times of trouble? They are questions with which all of us have wrestled. David wrestled and found his answer.
Pondering the questions of God’s Word can draw us more deeply into a strong and mature faith. But we have to wrestle with them honestly and openly.
But wise questions and sincere listening can also open doors to those around us, believers and non-believers. We need to recognize what Jesus knew and clearly modeled – that questions mixed with a listening heart tear down walls and build bridges while talking and telling often build walls and tear down bridges.
What are the questions you need to let God ask you? He is listening. And what questions can you ask someone else and then listen rather than tell.